Sunday, June 06, 2010

.. Not my will, but Yours be done ..

The last week has been a very burdened one, a travailing of the soul.

Straight after the very successful and impactful Asia Conference 2010, my beloved church was involved in a case of alleged misuse of church funds.

My first thought was, "Again"?? I mean, this is not the first time we are in the headlines on the newspapers. There were a couple of incidents years back where we were also accused of some issues that were never the truth. The church worshiped Sun Ho instead of God... The church were forced to buy her CDs.. The church forced people to give... etc etc etc.

And the truth is, God vindicated us every time. God is justice. The truth will always prevail.

So when we were in the news again, my first thought was, surely we will be vindicated once again! Surely we will be proven innocent once again!

But, this time round, the case is really quite different, and is more serious than the previous ones. In a way that more authorities are involved in the investigation, where the public claims that there must be really "something wrong"!

And reading the comments of the public really made my heart boiled. Accusations upon accusations upon accusations. No wonder the Bible says the devil is the accuser of the brethen.

But my heart especially hurts when I read about the accusations against Pastor Kong, and Sun. They have been the greatest mentors that we can ever have. If anyone has seen their sacrifices and how they had laid their lives for God and this church, how can anyone still possibly accuse them?

The thing is, people who spoke against them, are people who never knew them! And they have the cheek to speak as if they are speaking the truth. How demonic can that be.

Read comments from some ex-CHC members. And it grieved me even more.

My stand is, there is no perfect church. There is no perfect pastor. There can be no perfect human being. Every one of us makes mistakes in life.

But even if the church you used to attend is not the church for you, still, don't criticize the church and mock at the teachings that you grew up with.

I don't believe in speaking against a church, a pastor, a fellow person. We are told to bless and not to curse nor murmur nor grumble, let even accuse.

And some people who think that they are the smartest of all, say that we are "blind-followers". The truth is we also don't believe in following blindly. They think we don't have a brain??

We believe in loyalty. I believe in loyalty. I believe in 饮水思源... I believe in being grateful and appreciative to people, especially those who has sown into my life.

A church is a family. It is not just an organisation. It is a place where people will learn how to accept one another and encourage one another in life. So much more, so much more.

For us, even though we feel that the misuse of funds would never had happened, with the way of how the church leadership has been so transparent with the usage of the funds, and the spirit of excellence in doing things we have seen through all these years.

But, even if it is true, so what? SO WHAT? We all learn from mistakes don't we?

Something that is really beautiful emerged from this whole incident. The kind of unity. The kind of support. The kind of love for our pastors and the church. Seeing them in the FB statuses of my friends is really so encouraging!

I believe that this whole incident has also brought forth the church to another level of praying, and seeking God. Because even I myself have been praying more! Indeed some time, some things have to happen so that we will humble ourselves and cry out to God!

I have been praying to God that He will deliver us. I told God that I have faith in the church. I have faith in Pastor Kong. Even if this time is really an over-look, I am OK! We'll all move on! We will still support our pastors and we will be stronger!

But if we are convicted, I can imagine the "cheer" of the world, of the public. I can imagine the smug look on the faces. The jeer of these arrogance people, laughing at the church of the living God.

And I really dislike this! :(

I was walking to campus on Thurs and praying along the way. I told God that I really dislike the arrogance of the people of the world. I asked God not to let this happen where these people will have the opportunity to laugh and mock at the church.

But then as I prayed, God reminded me to pray this.

Not my will, but His be done.

I felt very comforted in my heart. I told God, yea... I will put my trust in You, Lord. Not my will, but let Yours be done...

Definitely this incident is a rather worrying one. But I know He is in control..... Have to learn to trust in His Sovereignty, and that all things will work together for good.

I was praying again on Friday early morning, and felt very encouraged and ministered by Ps 18. Verse 27 really encourages me!

"For You will save the humble people,
But will bring down the haughty looks."

Simple verse, but really encourages my heart.

Whatever the findings may be, I believe this whole incident will lift up the church to another level. That is what a challenge is all about. Breaking through and going forth.

People of the world and people who never really encountered God and His love in this house and in this City Harvest family will never understand why we are so passionate, why we can be so loyal people.

It's not about following blindly.

It's about a family.

I will forever be thankful and grateful to Pastor Kong, Sun and this City Harvest family. Because this is where I found God. This is where I find my purpose in life.


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